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Easiest diet plan ever!


But pyramids are fatter at the bottom. Was there a misunderstanding in the art department? They call this the "Diet Pyramid." See, the woman at the top is a heifer because she's eating a huge sundae. In the centre, she's just holding a cookie, but she's still looking somewhat bovine. At the bottom she's given up both eating and holding food, and she's thinner than Ally McBeal (well, almost).

Lovely message. And I still don't understand the relevance of the whole pyramid concept.


On the other hand, I'd rather give up nourishment than ingest the results of some of the recipes they suggest.

This
might be a really delicious flavour combination. But I guess I'll never know, because there's not a chance in hell I'll be trying it.

I have to give props for originality, though -- that watercress garnish is simply priceless.

If you're preparing it ahead of time, it must be "used" within an hour. Note, they don't say "consumed." I think that's pretty telling.
Okay, but how skinny will I get if I just HOLD the drink and don't actually consume it?


I'll just have a glass of water and a bottle of antacids, thank you.

Too much dieting can make you delusional, can't it?

Feeling nauseated yet? No? Okay, how about if someone offered you a glass of canned beef stock mixed with tomato juice? What if they described it to you as "glistening?" Best of all, what if they told you it had "floaters" on top?

I thought that might do the trick.


Ooh, look, it's another super-shiny "diet" food. I always thought I was a pretty good cook, but darn it all, I can never get my food to glisten like that.

What do you think is the "secret" that they mention? Could it be some mystery ingredient that makes everything so shiny? Or is it that the pork is served on a bed of larvae to ensure that you'll be too grossed out to actually consume any calories? Perhaps we'll never know.

Why, I can see my reflection in those pork chops!

Still not sure you're ready to completely give up food?
Try clicking
here for encouragement.


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